> 📗 The following story stands alone and can be read without any knowledge of my prior works, but does involve story elements that appeared previously in [Vapid](https://eleanorkonik.com/vapid/) %% ( [[2021-11-10 Vapid (DRAFT)]] ) %%. Jhaki Swainswallow hurriedly unlocked the gate to her hometown monastery, eager to introduce her prospective fiancé to her father. The guard honked a warning. Her beloved belted out a startled laugh. Jhaki flushed red with embarrassment and muttered, "The Abbot says dogs are too easy to bribe." ## Afterword I first learned about guard geese from an L. E. Modesitt novel; I've long since forgotten which one, but if you're curious, it was part of [the Imager Portfolio series](https://www.lemodesittjr.com/the-books/imager-portfolio/). I didn't think much of it until I stumbled across news about China using domestic geese to guard the border with Vietnam. It turns out that, for an animal my husband likes to refer to as "demon shit birds," they are surprisingly well-suited to helping humans. While most birds react silently or not at all to potential threats, geese have distinctively loud honks they aren't the least bit shy about deploying. They're also unusually territorial, and can see a lot farther than you'd think — farther than people, really, and they can even see into the ultraviolet spectrum. They don't see very well at night, but this turns out to be a bonus; it's harder to poison them with drugged treats. Goose wings have surprisingly good weapons, too. In addition to a sharp, serrated beak, they have club-like knobs on the "wrists" of their wings. While they're better at dealing with foxes than say, a bear, they've been known to break human bones with their wings. Domestic geese generally get to be about 20 pounds. Even [the U.S. military uses guard geese](https://apnews.com/article/4d88d888221a417cefffcff7743a5789). As I dug deeper, I was surprised to discover that geese may be one of the oldest domesticated animals. They probably were fully domesticated in the second millennium BCE, but they were _definitely_ around in Roman times; according to Putarch, they were even responsible for foiling a Gallic attack. It turns out that geese are sacred to the goddess Juno and tended to cluster around her temple on Capitoline Hill. The Gallic army had Rome under siege and were trying a surprise attack under cover of night; they fed the local dogs fresh meat to keep them quiet, but the geese were so loud and freaked out by the Gallic soldiers that it woke up the Roman garrison. I imagine it was a similar situation to the deer in Nara; among the Japanese Shinto they're considered the messengers of the gods and feature in many stories. The one I heard when I was in Nara (it's actually where I got engaged!) involved a Shinto monk crossing the island on a mystical white deer that settled outside the temple; it's considered sinful to kill them (and was for a number of years, punishable by death). Deer aren't particularly good guard animals, but geese aren't alone. Llamas (particularly castrated male llamas) are also great guard animals. Llamas bond with similar herd animals (sheep, alpacas, goats, deer) — they'll even bond with turkeys. They guard baby animals, and have a shrill neigh for when they spot danger. Like geese, they're territorial enough to actually attack predatory threats — they're [famous for chasing off foxes and wild dogs](https://www.spokesman.com/stories/1996/mar/19/beware-of-llama-animals-bond-with-sheep-then-will/). They're effective enough at scaring off canine that foxes won't even take bait meat if it's on the fox's side of a fence! Alpacas have similar instincts, but are less effective since they're smaller. Unusual guard animals aren't limited to land, though. [Dolphins make good guards](https://thehill.com/policy/international/3470146-russian-navy-deploys-trained-dolphins-to-guard-base-satellite-images/), too. The United States Navy uses combat dolphins to keep divers away from important naval basis, but they aren't alone. The Russian navy has been using trained dolphins to guard its Black Sea naval base, and its northern fleet uses beluga whales and seals in combat roles. Somehow, geese don't seem quite so weird after all. ## Further Reading - Here's an interesting [study about the history of geese domestication and hybridization](https://academic.oup.com/g3journal/article/10/9/3061/6060107). - Here's more on [why geese make good guard animals](https://www.offthegridnews.com/how-to-2/geese-as-guard-dogs-yep-and-they-just-might-be-better-at-it-too/) - Here's a fun graphic about the difference between [alpacas and llamas](https://www.reddit.com/r/BOLIVIA/comments/m3dwhu/alpacas_vs_llamas/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share) that I've found very helpful. - Here's a great breakdown explaining more about [why llamas are great guard animals](https://www.alpacamagic.com.au/livestock-guardians/).